I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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