Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
