Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
