It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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