i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize