the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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