So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
You made out with two different species that night
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
