Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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