Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
