just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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