Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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