You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
