hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
