Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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