At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
