Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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