no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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