Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
We need to rekindle our bromance
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
