Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
this just has baby written all over it
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
foreskin is a definite game changer
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
