Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Acid is not a monday night drug
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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