Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
