How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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