Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize