Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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