I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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