Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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