PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize