32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
is that a dick in a sweater?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize