Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
So squirting runs in the family.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
