Where is the hickey?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
