That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
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