Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
