thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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