okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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