I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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