Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
well you can't waste a boner
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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