well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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