i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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