how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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