I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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