yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
