theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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