I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize