I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize