hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
