worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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