it wasn't lemon gatorade
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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