I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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