have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
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