dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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